Worry

Alright, those of you know who me at ALL know that I am a worrier. I have been since I was little. I worried about everything. I don't really worry about things that are happening in the moment, but I worry more about the future and unknown things. I can worry myself to the most unrealisic scenario in the world.

Example (relevant to my life right now): I need to have all emergency numbers memorized before I leave and written in 5 different places throughout my luggage. Why? If something happens I need to be able to call someone, and if I can't get in touch with one person I will need to call another and if I am jet lagged I might forget the number so I will need to look somewhere to find the number but if my luggage is lost that will be a problem so I will put it in my carry on but what if someone steals my carry on? then I am stuck and I will be sitting on a curb somewhere in the middle of Madagascar unable to call anyone for help. I should write the numbers on my arm! But what if I get sweaty on the plane and the number rubs off and I forget the numbers and all my luggage is lost or stolen I AM GOING TO BE LOST!!!!!!

Now. That is just an example, and I am not feeling that neurotic right this moment. As I have gotten older God has been convicting me of this sin and I have been (slowly) getting a little better at it. But worry is something I REALLY struggle with. There is no magic cure for worry. Nothing that makes it magically go away and suddenly I am a worry free person. I just have to confess it and choose to trust God every minute.

That said, right now my dad is in emergency surgery having his appendix out.  And I am approximately 4000 miles away. <dislike>

Ironically though, I am not worried. Would I like to be home with my family right now? Yes of course. Would I like to give my dad a hug? More than anything. But no matter where I am, it is in God's hands. It is always in God's hands. There's a part of me that wants to worry about what might possibly happen while I am in Madagascar and unable to talk a lot, but instead I am choosing to thank God that I am here, able to keep in pretty instant contact with my family and find out what is happening. I am choosing to thank God that technology allowed me to skype with my dad and tell him I love him, even if I couldn't give him that hug.

Philippians 4:6-7 says "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

It's not a suggestion. It's a command. It's not a last choice when I can't do anything else. He says DO NOT be anxious about ANYTHING! But in EVERYTHING... Pray.  

And then the beautiful promise of peace that passes understanding. Every command has a promise, and this one is awesome.

I am choosing to trust and not be anxious. I am praying for my dad and my family. I am thanking God that I am able to have the contact that I do and that He is in control of every situation. I have an amazing peace that passes understanding that is keeping me from worrying further. Thank you God.